Ideas for a Thriller to Write When I am a Middle Aged Accounts Manager

I'm a human rights lawyer. Or a journalist. Or a human rights journalist. I was married to a diplomat. Or a politician, but a good one. And she was beautiful. But she died. Was killed. No, died.

No she was in a car crash.

Anyway, so she has some office, or a computer that I never go on. In a shared office. Actually, we both have our own offices because she is so messy. Actually, I'm messy, but that's just how I have to work. I smoke and drink too much coffee and I like whiskey. This is all incidental.
I find out, from this office, or her computer in the shared office that she was having an affair. A series of letters, or emails. Or printed out emails. She was having an affair with a lobbyist. For guns. Or war, or tobacco. Something shitty. BUT, she was also being pressured by him for help with his gun/war/tobacco lobbying. AND she was giving in. She was also pregnant. But no one else knows. Or the police told me. Or I find out from the printed out emails.

I decide to take my revenge on him, by exposing him as a corrupt lobbyist. There isn't enough evidence, so to do this I have to forge letters, or sign emails, but that's fine because I can do her signature because of some reason from the past which is light hearted but has a dark edge to it. Or is about a restaurant where we knew the owner. He was Italian.

But then at the archive, or the city library which has those green reading lights and a security guard that knows my name, I meet a woman. She is hot. A beautiful lawyer, or journalist, depending on what I am. We have sex.

She helps me get some information I want but also through her I find out that my wife was pregnant with The Lobbyist's child. So I probably didn't know already, and no one else knew. I cry. Actually, I punch a wall after drinking too many whiskeys. The hot lawyer smokes, and so do I. I smoke cigars. No, cheroots. No, cigarettes. Lucky Strikes. No, cigarillos. A pipe. Hookha pipes. Cigarettes.

I amount enough evidence to bring a case against The Lobbyist, but then the Beautiful Lawyer turns out to be a double agent and threatens to expose me as a fraud if I don't do something specific. I do it, or I won't do it and it's about money or guns. Or drugs.

If I do it, then The Lobbyist goes down, but I've helped guns or drugs. If I don't do it, then the Lobbyist will walk free, but I've been moral and retained my integrity.

I do it, or I don't do it. Something happens, I'm either crushed and bitter and drink whiskey, or I go to The Lobbyist's house and piss on his car.